Censor this…

  • I got a long-form blog post in the works that I hope to post tomorrow but in the meantime check this out. Even if you’re “protected” by the 1st Amendment to express yourself freely, there’s always an entity out there that will reprimand you because you diverted from what they expect of you in terms of conduct. Leave a like and follow the page so you can stay up to date with my future posts. As always, peace and keep it real.

Hey, don’t click send! : Stop making these 7 common Email mistakes

We’ve all done one or more of the 7 mistakes listed below, so let’s improve on that before we click send. Leave a like if you’ve learned something new and give the page a follow so you can stay up to date with future posts.

  1. Using all caps in your subject line: This is usually used to grab attention which will work, but unless it’s urgent don’t use it, because your recipient will perceive it as possible SPAM mail. In addition, writing in all caps to a lot of people on the internet is equivalent to shouting and is jarring, so tone it down.
  1. Unclear Subject Lines – “If the subject isn’t clear, [the receiver] might not know what the conversation is about,” says Moah. Be specific with the subject line so your recipient understands what the content of the message will entail. Don’t use generic subject lines such as “Hi” or “Please read” because this type of banal subject line can just be ignored. Furthermore, the subject line is subject to change when multiple emails need to be sent among a group. With that said, the main takeaway here is, that if you don’t write a new subject line, it will lead to your recipients not easily finding the thread. 
  1. Not using “CC” or BCC” – “Adding people on an email in the ‘to:’ heading notes that input is expected, while ‘cc:’ informs recipients that they are being brought into the loop but that no action is required,” Moah says
  1. Writing too much or too little – This all depends on the context. The length of the message needs to be appropriate to the situation. If it’s an Email to a coworker to get lunch somewhere, a sentence or two will suffice. However, if it’s an Email that pertains to something work-related, a longer message (a paragraph or two) is usually expected. 
  1.  Not ending the Email with gratitude – It’s common courtesy to end the Email with a “Thank you” or a “Thanks in Advance”. This signifies that you appreciate their time for reading and giving your message the attention it needs. According to Boomerang, ending your email with these phrases will boost your response rate by 36 percent compared to other ones such as “Best regards’ ‘, ”Cheers”, and ”Best “. 
  1. Sending Emails on Monday – This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t send an Email on Monday, it’s just that people are not in the best mood and are more susceptible to making mistakes. Boomerang states that people sending Emails on Monday are the most negative in their subject lines and therefore won’t be responded to because no one has time for negativity. 
  1. Expecting an immediate response – Even though Emails are quick to send, it’s not text messages, so don’t expect an immediate response because it’s not guaranteed. The recipient will respond whenever they’re ready.

Works Cited 

Vozza, Stephanie. “Stop Annoying Everyone With These Common Email Mistakes.” Pocket, 31 Aug. 2018, getpocket.com/explore/item/stop-annoying-everyone-with-these-common-email-mistakes?utm_source=pocket-newtab&fbclid=IwAR3aTCnVlK1FAjnoBNMWNZ_caz4pNW_iadJGR1_WXjuq361Hl7iT2Xu0GGA.

Bring ’em back in 5 : Five Life-Affirming Words We Should Bring Back Into Use

Could revitalizing words with positive meanings cause us to have a more positive outlook on life?

Welcome readers, 

In this post, I want to share 5 life-affirming words you may not be familiar with, and I hope you can gain insight from this new vocabulary. With that said, the article briefly gave background on lexicographer and TV personality Susie Dent who is determined to bring uplifting words into common usage again, such as the word “respair”. “Respair was last used around 1525. Even though “respair” is an archaic word to its pessimistic counterpart “despair”, it is being revitalized in this post as Susie Dent might have hoped for, and with that, people can become informed on the array of vocabulary that has made the English language vast. Anyway, I want to reiterate a caveat that some of these words are not in common usage. However, these words were once ubiquitous in dictionaries and I’m sure they were used daily. I think it’s good to know about their existence and meanings. I’ll include the article’s description in italics. Works cited will be included. So, let us begin.  

  1. Adamate – To love very much

This verb is formed on the root of the Latin verb amare, which means “to love”. There is evidence of its use by dramatists in the 17th century.

Amare is also represented by the French word amant, which means “lover” and is now mainly used in English in connection with adulterous relationships. While it is difficult to establish exactly why “adamate” did not become popular, the more negative associations of the French loan might have played a role.

2. Autometry: Self-Measurement, Self-Estimation

3. Biophilia: Love of Life

This word is probably best known as the title of Icelandic singer Björk’s seventh studio album. “Biophilia” and its counterpart “necrophilia” were coined in the 19th century as technical terms in psychology. The popularity of the term “necrophilia” and its increasing association with deviant sexual practices have been boosted by a number of high-profile criminal cases.

“Biophilia”, by contrast, has remained fairly restricted to technical discussions in psychoanalysis. Nonetheless, its literal meaning – the love of life – suggests a broader human need or desire

4. Collachrymate: To Weep Together

5. Mesology: The Science of Achieving Happiness

Works Cited : 

Pons-Sanz, Sara. “Five Life-Affirming Words We Should Bring Back Into Use.” Pocket, 21 Jan. 2022, getpocket.com/explore/item/five-life-affirming-words-we-should-bring-back-into-use?utm_source=pocket-newtab&fbclid=IwAR2bBlpRbUQWDSyGxBqfdn10VRqYhQMKfoqsl4nK55bGC_Q22I48JOjwA5I.

You suck at listening : Here’s How to Remember What People Say

Hello readers, 

I want to share some takeaways I got from reading an article about improving active listening. What intrigued me was how author Cash Nickerson (The Samurai Listener) compared listening to martial arts in terms of it being an activity that requires you to be in the moment. Moreover, Nickerson uses the analogy of martial arts as a way for the reader to understand that being receptive and aware will bring out desired outcomes and improve your fortitude to continue. I made a previous post about active listening a while back, but this post will divulge more details that I hope you, actually scratch that, we all can learn from and apply. With that said, below is an acronym (ARE U PRESENT) that was used in the article for a better understanding. I will include my perspective in italics.  

“We come into conversations with our own agendas and low attention spans, but if you want to build better relationships you need to master active listening.” 

– Stephanie Vozza

Awareness: Start with basic awareness. Get your face out of your phone, and stop thinking about what you’re going to do later today.

Reception: Be willing to receive new information. You may be present, but your mind can be closed. Let go of opinions, and be willing to drop your biases.

Me: You can be physically present but if your mind starts drifting, everything coming your way will cause you to be confused. A good way to always be present is by having consistent eye contact when conversing. 

Engagement: Being engaged involves back-and-forth fairness, like a Ping-Pong match. “I talk, you talk,” says Nickerson. 

Me: Reduce the amount of talking over, interrupting, and so forth. If not, it will ruin the rhythm and flow. 

Understanding: Listen with the intention of interpreting what the other person is saying. Get into a place of understanding, where you’re both speaking the same language, figuratively and literally. 

Me: If what I said above is done, information will be understood and reciprocated seamlessly. 

Persistence: Be willing to stay the course and not let your mind wander. If you get bored and tired, push through to maintain your attention.


R
esolution: Bring the conversation to a close with takeaways and next steps. “Leaders are doers,” says Nickerson. 

Emotions: Respect the existence of emotions and their roles. “Emotions can work for you or against you,” says Nickerson. “Recognize their roles and learn to discern them and their effect on your ability to hear others.”

Senses: Employ your other senses to help you remember. Look for body language clues or even potential bluffing in the other person.

Ego: Try to take your ego out of the conversation. A humble leader can listen more easily because they don’t correlate their ego with success.

Nerves: Look for stress or tension; it can get in the way of being able to listen.

Tempo: Get in touch with the rhythm of the speaker. Being out of sync with their way of talking can make it hard to listen.

The Art of Listening - The Route X

Wake up world and listen! : A podcast recap of 2021.

Welcome readers, 

2021 has been a good year for both my podcast series (Black History 365: The Throw Down & Real Free – Flowing Words) Podcast creators know that their content needs to be engaging, consistent, relevant, and the most important component memorable. In regards to this, every podcast you’ve listened to has had something that attracted you to it, and if it’s something that is enjoyable and adds value to what you’re seeking, you’ll continue to listen and recommend it to your peers. Having said that, I would be lying if I said I don’t review the analytics for both my podcasts. I think everyone should consistently monitor it to see what they need to improve on so they can bestow the best quality content their listeners will look forward to weekly or monthly. Furthermore, some might find it incredulous that they aren’t seeing growth and I understand the frustration but if your mindset is fixated on that, your content will suffer because you might come up with all sorts of ways to appease your listeners that’ll stray away from the theme of your podcast or in other words, the relevancy. Anyway, I want to share the analytics to my podcast as a way for readers here that are podcasters or want to start one, understand that people will be listening worldwide and with every upload. The world is your stage when it comes to podcasting, all minds will connect with your content. Whether it’s a positive or negative reception, in the end, it’ll leave a lasting impact for them to leave satisfied for more or disconnect forever, but new listeners will always come knocking to enter your “podcast door”. 

Podcast Mic Vector Art, Icons, and Graphics for Free Download

Black History 365: The Throw Down Streamed very well in 5 countries during 2021 

  1. South Africa 
  2. Kenya 
  3. Canada 
  4. Sweden 
  5. Singapore 
  • 42% of my listeners listen to my podcast between 5 AM and 11 AM, making it the most popular time. 
  • Episodes range from 5 to 10 minutes so a quick history lesson is given that is succinct and easy to listen to. Across the last 32 episodes, 192 minutes have been recorded. 
Globe Painting Painting by Setsiri Silapasuwanchai

Real Free – Flowing Words streamed well in two countries

  1. The United States of America 
  2. Ireland 
  1. 41% of my listeners tune in to Real Free – Flowing Words between 11PM – 5AM. 
  2. 238 minutes of content has been produced across 20 episodes. 

Dare to share (How to tell if you’re oversharing)

Welcome readers,

It’s been a while since I’ve done a long-form blog post, and I think you’ll enjoy this one because I think it’s something we’re all guilty of doing at one point in our lives, or for some people, consistently. With that said, in this post, I’ll be talking about oversharing, how to tell if you’re oversharing (A.K.A. Too Much Information) and ways you can stop. 

The New York Times describes oversharing as “ exclusively talking about personal matters and rejecting to volley the conversation back and forth. Some of us when being disclosed frivolous information might interrupt someone mid-speech to say “TMI ! (Too much information). There’s a cost to revealing information to a party that doesn’t need to hear it.  In regards to this, it can be detrimental if revealed to the wrong person. For one, you can alienate people who feel uncomfortable with the amount of information you share, and rightly so. Hey, they’re probably dealing with dilemmas and there’s no reason to add yours to theirs in hopes of them helping you resolve it. In addition, you might think it’s innocuous to disclose information you need to resolve to whoever might listen, but if that person doesn’t have your best interest at heart, then you’ll be at risk of them taking advantage of you. From coworkers, to using Facebook like a diary, to the person seated next to you on a train/plane, it’s human nature to communicate any personal matters to someone willing to listen and give appropriate feedback but as mentioned, sometimes the risks can outweigh the benefits. Divulging into details without properly vetting the person is sort of reckless. So, it’s better to say as little as possible. On another note, do you know what oversharing can do to already established relationships? You’ve guessed it, the end of that relationship. This depends on the content of what’s shared but once oversharing begins it becomes a stream of things better left unsaid. Having said that, below are signs of oversharing and the reasons behind oversharing, and ways to stop oversharing. 

Signs of oversharing : 

  • Your relationships are unbalanced: You don’t want everyone to know way more about you than you know about them.
  • You’re afraid of silence: Are you the one who has to initiate the break of silence? Those around you might prefer silence. Engaging in a one-sided interaction can lead to the person you’re interacting with being uncomfortable. As mentioned earlier, say as minimal as possible or nothing at all if you have the discipline. 
  • You’re loved ones turn into a therapist
  • No one interacts with you on social media: Just to get attention one can use it as a place to disclose everything that’s on their mind and yeah… someone will either like it or call you out on it. 
  • You’re at work: Keep work interactions with coworkers and your personal life information separate as much as possible, cause it can backfire. 

The reasons for oversharing 

  • A false sense of intimacy 
  • Solace in a stranger 
  • A misguided attempt to fast track a relationship 
  • Poor boundaries 
  • A hasty effort to make someone else feel comfortable 

How to stop oversharing

The number one way to stop oversharing is identifying the reason you’re compelled to share in the first place. By coming to that realization, and understanding why will help you curtail your eagerness to overshare. If you think you overshare because of attention then find out what triggers your desire for constant attention. On the other hand, once you get a hold of your oversharing, start placing your thoughts into private outlets (a notepad app on your phone, a google/word doc). Use a notebook cautiously because if you lose it and someone picks it up, all that oversharing is in written form for them to be entertained by. Anyway, to close out this post below are ways to overcome your oversharing. 

  • Give yourself a time restriction. If you’re talking for minutes at a time, you’re probably turning a conversation into a monologue.
  • Find another outlet. Take up journaling instead of posting, or start leaving yourself voice memos to verbally process something.
  • Practice active listening – Make sure you’re asking the other person questions, rather than constantly dominating the sharing. 
  • Avoid social media when you’re feeling emotional. This is a rule to live by in any context.

No fillers zone

Welcome readers and Happy Fall,

A lot of us are guilty of using verbal fillers in our everyday speech such as, Um, Uh, You know, like, and so forth. When used seldomly it’s not bad but frequent usage can be an annoyance to your listener. This can cause them to become distracted by it and thus lose interest in what you’re conveying. With that said, in this post, I’ll be explaining four tips to reduce verbal fillers in your speech. I say reduce instead of eliminate because verbal fillers will inevitably arise at some point depending on the circumstance.

  1. Get comfortable with silence (Mindset): We fill in the silence with filler words as a substitute for punctuation (periods and commas) with words such as um, uh, like, you know, etc… Furthermore, when the interaction goes silent we become self-conscious and think we’ll forget what we’re talking about or risk being interrupted mid-speech. If you’re long winded you’ll risk adding fillers as you move your point across. Moreover, whenever I record my podcast episodes I do my best not to add verbal fillers. Once I complete a sentence I stop talking (pause) and resume when ready. This gives the listener the chance to process what they heard.
  1. Develop a new habit with practice: Sometimes we’re unaware we’re saying filler words unless someone brings it to our attention. So to improve, practice slowing down your speech so you don’t stutter and visualize each sentence’s beginning and end. This will allow you to see your filler words stand out and stop yourself before saying them. 

  2. Say “period” and “pause” when practicing by yourself out loud and once you’re comfortable doing that,  say it in your head or use another way so you can remind yourself to pause or end your sentence.
  1. Take a breath: This will help you be more composed and allow your speech to come out clearly.

Real Free flowing words podcast : “You gotta zoom in” an episode on zoom Dysmorphia

https://anchor.fm/therhymerula/embed/episodes/You-Gotta-Zoom-In–An-Episode-on-Zoom-Dysmorphia-e1783ld

  • I don’t post the episodes to my podcast that often on my blog site but I want people who have never been informed about my podcast to check it out. It’s the audio version to my written blog work on here, or more formally called a “Reformatted Podcasts”. Lastly, I want to add a link to an article for any of you new podcasters or seasoned ones. It’s on the seven types of podcasts formats, and best believe yours is one of the seven mentioned. Click the URL to read.
  • Use the URL to listen to the episode. As always, peace and keep it real.
Zoom dysmorphia: Record increase in plastic surgeries during work from home  | Deccan Herald

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