RFFW Podcast : You can never HIDE from SELF : T.F.S. (TRUTH, FALSE, SHADOW SIDE)

https://anchor.fm/therhymerula/embed/episodes/You-can-never-HIDE-from-SELF–T-F-S–TRUTH–FALSE–SHADOW-SIDE-e1p18em

  • Check out the latest podcast episode which is the audio version of one my latest long form blog post. If you haven’t read it, don’t fret and just take the information in by listening. Click or copy and paste the URL so you get to the episode. If you liked what you’ve heard or liked any of my past posts, give the page a follow so you can stay up to date with my future posts. As always, peace and keep it real.

Take it home with you: Is Homework necessary moving forward?

  • With an abundance of data out there on homework, it’s hard to determine if homework is either helping or hurting students.
  • Leave a like if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read and hit the follow button so you can stay up to date with my future posts.

Welcome readers,

Homework is understood as a daily activity that prepares a student for future challenges in a curriculum (i.e. tests, projects). However, some questions need to be answered and those are, how much value needs to be put on homework? And how much significance does homework have in terms of it improving a student’s comprehension and performance in the classroom? Aside from homework, there are a myriad of other ways a student’s performance is evaluated, it’s just that homework is something parents can see their child putting effort into when not in the classroom, that is until the report card arrives in the mail. Unless there’s a P.T.A meeting (a parent and teacher meeting), the parent will not get the totality of their child’s performance once they leave home, unless the child happens to be homeschooled. Moreover, some research suggests that homework can hinder achievement and in some cases students’ overall mental health. Additionally, back in the 30s and 40s homework was abolished but made a brief return in the 50s, which brought forth a desire to sharpen students’ math and science skills. It was defunct during the Vietnam War and revitalized with a stronger emphasis on a student’s projected performance in the 80s. With that said, homework is a sort of “balance sheet” that gives a teacher and parents a snapshot of the effort and progress a student provides to their schoolwork when not in the classroom. Furthermore, the purpose of homework is generally understood as an individual practice that students generally detest when class is over. However, homework is one method that teachers use as an indicator of the attentiveness and comprehension a student has of the subject matter. 

        The value homework has during a student’s academic career varies and its significance towards the overall student’s performance in some cases (like in college) begins to diminish. This can all be due to the program a college student is in and the professor’s syllabus, which sometimes from my experience had minuscule worth compared to the other factors that made up the grading criteria. Having said that, homework is good practice (Allen Iverson voice, We talkin’ ‘bout Practice?!) for the material covered in class, but some students might perceive homework to be frivolous to their final grade if they’re doing “good” or “excellent” in everything else on the syllabus. A Duke researcher named Harris Cooper conducted one of the most comprehensive studies on homework efficacy to date. Cooper reported, “No strong evidence was found for an association between the homework–achievement link and the outcome measure (grades as opposed to standardized tests) or the subject matter (reading as opposed to math).” Achievement in the classroom isn’t solely dependent on homework and sometimes the two can be conflated. If one were to ask someone, let’s use a parent in this case “if homework is valuable for their child’s academic success”? A parent would most likely answer that homework is a valuable practice that they would like to see their child doing consistently and efficiently. It would be an aberration to parents if homework was removed from the syllabus. In other words, familiarity begets comfort and if homework were to be eliminated from a syllabus, then the other factors in the grading criteria will compensate for it and determine the student’s success or failure. As mentioned earlier, parents need to see firsthand the effort their child is putting into schoolwork and they might even protest that homework remains in their child’s studies.

It’s challenging to come up with a definitive answer on whether homework is helping or hurting students because there is a lot of juxtaposition that occurs with studies trying to answer how beneficial or unnecessary it is to students’ learning. The grading system gets more nuanced as students progress in school and homework in some cases depending on the course, can become optional, a way to self-check what was learned that day or week in class. In regards to this, this self-guided way of learning can go in conjunction with a psychological concept known as spacing effect, which suggests that it’s easier to learn material when it’s been worked over several times in short bursts rather than compiling everything learned from that day or week in long study sessions. Furthermore, shorter homework assignments can be more beneficial than heavy workloads, and with this sense of respite, the chances of completion rate can improve. 

In closing, the value and significance of homework in education are up for debate because they’ll be an amalgamation of perspectives that see homework as a customary duty a student should be doing daily, while others looking at the grand scheme of things might find it pointless and perceive it as not always leading students to an auspicious outcome if they are falling behind in other areas in the course. With respect to that, homework should not be seen as a pacifier to salvage inadequacies in a student’s performance in other aspects of the curriculum, but an activity that will create a work ethic and confidence so a student can overcome challenges as they progress through their academic career.

WORKS CITED

Horaczek, Stan. “Kids Are Onto Something: Homework Might Actually Be Bad.” Pocket, 24 Sept. 2021, getpocket.com/explore/item/kids-are-onto-something-homework-might-actually-be-bad?utm_source=pocket-newtab&fbclid=IwAR0wIVy5vphFaAgkNJV2asGkYMp9bNahmLEOyCHz0AGgKAF5z5dnqRc6gVg.

It never ends, unless… The Ugly Truth About MICROMANIPULATION

Disclaimer: I’m not an expert on any of the nuances of narcissism and other personality types. This post is merely what I’ve learned from an article on Micromanipulation and how narcissists gain leverage in relationships for their benefit. If you have any feedback on this post and can enlighten me on this subject, leave it in the comment. Give the post a like and follow so you can be updated on my future posts. Peace and keep it real. 

Welcome readers, 

I’ve recently read an article on Micromanipulations and I want to share my insights. Someone reading this might have experienced or still is involved in a relationship with a narcissist, and I think presenting this post will give insight to the reader who might not be familiar with the damaging effects it can produce if not recognized and resolved. In this post, I will explain a few of the insidious tactics a narcissist uses to take control in subtle ways that an oblivious “victim” will not notice initially. Lastly, to close out the post I’ll address how there are, believe it or not, positive attributes to micromanipulation/narcissism. 

Painting credit – Jungwan Chae

The article explained Micromanipulation/Narcissism from the perspective of romantic relationships and how detrimental it is once the narcissist establishes control. However, I think Micromanipulation/Narcissism is applicable in all relationships, ones such as siblings, bosses, or parents who can be excessively controlling. I think it can be experienced in a multitude of ways. In addition, the ways to go about resolving it can vary. For example, if an employee was manipulated by a boss and was cognizant about it, then they would have to report it to the company board. However, there is always the risk of the boss being absolved without legitimate evidence. 

With any relationship, there is reciprocity of respect once it’s earned, but with narcissists, once they find an opening they’ll use misinformation and act duplicitous to get what they want even if it’s at the expense of their partner’s feelings. Additionally, if their efforts are futile after multiple attempts to elicit an immediate response, they will resort to “Micromanipulation” and this dangerous ploy will give them the confidence to repeatedly do it with ease. 

Most of us have displayed narcissist traits at one point in our lives. It’s inevitable when the ego needs to be satisfied. However, the extent it goes to all depends on the personality type. Additionally, specific circumstances and life events also play a factor. For instance, a boyfriend might get into a conversation with his girlfriend/boyfriend that they have a doctor’s appointment because of some unknown but concerning medical issue that they failed to immediately disclose. By confiding to their partner about their health issue, their partner (possibly soon to be ex) gets angry, but the manipulation reawakens their partner’s empathy. As a result, their partner begins to worry and thus the attention turns to the narcissist. 

    As mentioned in the introduction, the article explains the positive aspects of micromanipulation. The article states the following… A 2018 report from the University of Louisiana found that all kinds of narcissists along with manipulators and psychopaths (the so-called “dark triad of personality” traits) are capable of caring towards others; as long as they see benefits to themselves in doing so. To me, this doesn’t sound positive but rather disingenuous because the person being helped is under the notion that they are being helped and cared for by a person they trust. With that said, I think the way to curtail micromanipulation is to step back and recognize your partner’s behavior for what it is and compartmentalize your emotional responses from what’s going on, which I think is needed so you can discern the right actions to take in the future. 

In summary, awareness is imperative when coming up with a conducive way to deal with a narcissist in your life. By keeping track of each other’s behavior, you’ll notice micromanipulations before it becomes an onerous situation, because once that point is reached, the “exit” will be desperately sought after, and this is an indication that the relationship is on track to end. 

WORKS CITED 

“Micromanipulation: The Covert Tactic That Narcissists Use in Arguments to Reassert Control.” Pocket, 24 Nov. 2020, getpocket.com/explore/item/micromanipulation-the-covert-tactic-that-narcissists-use-in-arguments-to-reassert-control?utm_source=pocket-newtab&fbclid=IwAR1ce3SX_8Ia87dKAuXoU68MQmy_BM3zrYOzBsSrBwDFWr5JHDmvWID1JEY.

BE A MAN

Below is a recap of what was said in the video. I recommend watching the video for full context. Hit the follow button so you can stay up to date with future posts. 

1. Never tolerate indecency being done to you. Set boundaries.

Protect yourself from disrespect, and matter of fact not just yourself but your family and friends from outsiders. 

2. Have self-respect. Having high agreeableness will cause this weakness to be detrimental to your manhood. Here’s why, men like this don’t want others to be treated badly but will disrespect themselves by tolerating disrespect, in order to protect others. If a plane is going down, grab your emergency face mask before helping the person sitting next to you. Help yourself first before helping others. It’s not selfish, it’s survival. Be a man. This goes for relationships too, all kinds romantic, friendships, and professional, if they come at you with some bullshit, shun them until they apologize.  Be a man.

3. Don’t be a yes man and don’t be ashamed to say “No”. Protecting your peace is not mean. Preventing people from doing your harm is not mean. Speak your truth as a man and however, they react is not your responsibility. Moreover, this coincides with cancel culture. Being direct with the truth is offensive these days, so fabrications and saying what wants to be heard is deemed appropriate. Fuck your feelings and face the facts. Be a man

Be a Man – Liberty Community Online

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